Conversations with papa

"Why have you not accepted my friend request? Did you not like my photo or something?" He asks.
"Excuse me?" I respond.
"You know, facebook?"
"Dad, seriously?" I ask.
"And your sisters, they also requested friendships from you."
"No I had one of them on there and she removed me," I say.
"How come?"

A week later, my mom wants to connect with me on LinkedIn

"Are you going to see Doriad Laham? He'll be there I think."

"I don't know baba," I respond.

"Did you know he's Muslim? He just has a really Christian name, everyone thinks he's Christian," he tells me.

"Did you google him?" I ask.

"No no, that internet non-sense is your mother's job. I heard it from him in an interview with Al-Jazeera."

Says the man with the Facebook account

"I don't understand why there is always problems with the transportation system when there's a change in the weather. Living in Canada, you should be used to it. Weather is the only thing that you should become an expert in while living here," I say.

"Stupid people in this country. You know who else is stupid?" He asks.

"Arabs?" I respond.

"The ones that follow them here."

On his countless regrets.

"What would you do if I got arrested?" I ask.
"If that happens I'd really rather you end up in an Israeli jail than an Arab jail. The Israeli jail is like five star compared to the Arab one, and there's more chances of you getting out," he responds.
"So you wouldn't be mad?"
"No, I'd go kill the leader of the country that arrested you."
"It would be pretty cool if I got arrested though," I say.
"Yeah, it would be."
I love you too baba.