Gypsies the Love Affair

I can't explain it but I'm fascinated with gypsies. It could be from watching "Le Bossu de Notre Dame" too many times but anyway...I've said it before and I'll say it again, my favourite Fleetwood Mac song is "Gypsy" and I was even thinking of posting an ad on Craigslist requesting the company of a gypsy. I also like to make friends with Romanians because there's a lot of gypsies around there so I'm hoping to get introduced. I don't care if they steal my gold and passport. Frankly, I don't know where my gold is and my passport, well, hmm, it's a bad photo anyway.

Throughout my life, I've gone to see two gypsies. One more than 13 years ago courtesy of my mom, the other, who semi drugged me, was a recent experience. The latter was lame. I doubt her gypsiness frankly, hence why she drugged me.

The gypsies told me similar things, except for the fact that the experiences were over 13 years apart.

Both gypsies said I'd have two loves throughout my life. To a ten year old, that stuff doesn't matter, to a twenty something, that's essential. I'm quite certain I've surpassed that number, however, there's one I can't figure out if it was lust or love, so does that mean there is one left? Look gypsies, you're both wrong. But then I stop and think, no...gypsies can't be wrong! Another gypsy, a Samaria Jew in the desert whom I've never met, told someone I would never fall in love until the curse is broken. This is starting to freak me out. First of all, what curse? Where's my hand of Fatima? And my blue rock that repels the evil eye?

One gypsy told me I would be wealthy, another gypsy said I wouldn't worry about work, but said I'd be comfortable. A promotion in fact. Liar. As of awhile, I'm nouveau pauvre, a term I've continuously used to describe myself, so maybe this coming into money thing happens a) when I find love #2 and marry into money or b) get some job that pays well which will happen by the time I'm old. More details gypsy, more!!!

The new gypsy told me I would live in two countries my entire life. That's already been done, since I'm not born in Canada, I'm assuming I'm dying in Canada? First gypsy said I'd die in my 80s. That's way too old, bring the Samaria gypsy back, I need to ask her something. Maybe she'll confirm that I will indeed die of a drug overdose like I envisioned when I was 16. Highly unlikely.

What about happiness? No gypsies mentioned anything about this. But according to the Samaria Jew, there won't be much of it thanks to her comment. I'll swim in my imaginary money, thanks.

Note to anyone venturing out to discover gypsies, the desert ones are to be feared. Which is why I will go out and find one. I'm lacking adventure lately. Won't you join me?
image source: http://www.gavroche.org/vhugo/gallery/esmeralda.jpg